My Daily Toke

Archive for the ‘We just don’t get it’ Category

The courts have ruled that the biggest idiot ever convicted pirate Joel Tenenbaum has willfully infringed on copyrights, and has awarded the RIAA and the media companies $675,000 , $22,500 for each of the 30 songs he admitted to sharing. In a interview following the judgment, Tenenbaum noted that things could have gotten shitloads worse:

“I’m disappointed, but not surprised, but I’m thankful that it wasn’t much bigger, that it wasn’t millions.”

I don’t understand why people insist on sharing a file after they’ve downloaded it. Let the masses do it and you will still benefit. There are probably 1,000’s of people that download music and don’t even realize that they are seeding sharing it afterward. $675,000 seems a bit much for a jury of his peers to award the record companies because how do they expect the RIAA to get the money from him. They better hire the best bill collectors on earth, Rent-a-Center. When you owe them money they come to your house to take back the shit you have and they are relentless. He said he would have to file bankruptcy if he doesn’t win his appeal. I’m really glad that I stopped seeding downloading music and movies after my computer crashed the frist time. You download too much porn and you’re pretty much bound to get a virus. Tokes go out to Tenenbaum and his internet life, because its gonna be pretty boring.

This shit is not a joke…I repeat, not a joke….The fucking Pope is recording a CD. Also, Rush Limbaugh has just lost 600 lbs and stopped abusing prescription drugs, just kidding that will never happen, but unfortunately there will come a day when the Pope’s first single ecomes Itunes free song of the week, because no one will want to hear that shit. Pope Benedict has signed with major record label Geffen to cut an album of songs and prayers to the Virgin Mary. The pope will be accompanied by a choir recorded in Rome. The album will also feature classical music by an international group of composers of various faiths, to be performed by the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra at London’s Abbey Road studios, most famous for its association with the Beatles.

Ummm since when did the Vatican think it was a good idea to authorize this. The Vatican always makes an immediate jump to damn to hell anyone who portrays the Catholic church in a negative way, well except for their priests who touch children, they just get relocated. I can do without this old creepy white haired man, who is said to have the voice of a lullaby being read, singing anything because he should have better things to do. He’s the Pope, and although he looks like him, he’s no fucking Elton John. Does this mean he’s also going to be touring??? I certainly hope not.  I’ve already prepared myself mentally for the relase of the CD because there are a shitload of Catholics in the US and it’s ound to reach numer 1 first week. I’ll be planning a trip to Somalia for the week that his CD is released because I can’t bear to be riding down the street with my windows down and possibly have someone pull up next to me playing the Pope’s potential child molester lullaby-like voice.

P.S….check out his face for a sec…he kinda looks like a rat, Splinter is that you?…we kid we kid

Looks like you’ll have to keep your shitty ass car a little bit longer like me, because the cash for clunkers program may be cancelled due to lack of funds. Yes they did just begin the program on July 1st and it was part of the huge 819 billion dollar stimulus plan, but apparently toomany people have taken advantage of the plan. The allotted 1 illion dollars for rebates to be given has been used by approximately 200,000 who have requested the credit. Congressional sources said early Thursday evening that the program would be put on hold. But Obama administration officials said later that Clunkers had not been suspended and that they were studying the situation.

Although Cash for Clunkers was due to end on November 1st or whenver the 1 billion dollars was used, an early version of the program called for 4 billion dollars to e the amount given. It makes me it look as though when discussing amounts to give things listed in the stimulus plan, politicians all just sat around and threw out random figures without any hard projectory facts that would lead them to believe they were making pr0ductive decisions. With this and presidential administration time being given to have a beer with two creepos from Boston, I’m beginning to wonder where their priorities are because it seems as though they are focsing a bit more on nonsense and less on passing a healthcare bill that nearly 50 million americans would benefit from. We run the house and senate democrats,why the fuck can’t we get this done???

This is some bizzaro crazy face shit. Teens in San Ysidr, CA were caught with cannabis and heroin taped to their bodies. WTF are these kids doing smuggling drugs. I’ve never been able to grasp why people are so intrigued by quick cash that comes with such a huge risk. People really do get caught smuggling drugs, check out locked up abroad, that shit is no joke. Check out the dumbest kids of the year above.

According to the Dallas Morning news, Police are investigating a multiple shooting reported on the Texas Southern University campus. Currently there is now word on the identities or the conditions of thoss who have been shot. The shooting took place at an event Wednesday night hosted by city council member Peter Brown, who is running for mayor.

KTRK-TV in Houston reports Houston police say four people in all were shot at three different locations within a block, one on campus and two off campus.It’s so bizzaro world to me that things ike this are still happening in the world at a time when what we really all we really need is togetherness, we joke around and talk a lot of shit about people, but it’s all in good fun, …the national ecoonomy is in the shitter, swine flu is rapidly spreading and people still wanna run around shooting innocent people….this is America, I love this country but some of our people need a fuckin wake up call…Our respects go out to the families of the deceased its pretty unfortunate that they had to loose their loved ones in such a tragic way, we can only hope that authorities can find who ever is responsible very soon

While we’re on the subject of jeff conaway’s adopted daughter Lindsay, I thought I’d let you guys know that she is planning to start her own production company. She is reportedly teaming up with shitty business partner Kristi Kaylor, hopefully Kaylor will be different than the partner who was behind her stolen spray tan line, for which she is currently being sued. The pair are planning to create TV and movie projects that no one will watch in which Lohan can star in and do her best Tara Reid impression have already set the wheels in motion for two projects.

Lohan also plans to make the “female fashionista’s” answer to hit HBO series Entourage called Faux Real and a game show tentatively called That’s What Friends Are For, which will partner with charitable organizations. I don’t really mind what kind of fancy names you give these shows, but they can both be easily defined as… garbage. Can someone get Seacrest on the line please…Lindsay needs a second opportunity to star in Living Lohan because straight to DVD movies like Labor Pains just aren’t cutting it.  Lindsay, I want you to do well, really, so when your movie is released i’m going to get sky high and force myself to watch you new flick and everyone else should do the same.

According to the NY Daily News the fucking crazies that kill people for a living Taliban has been buying and selling children to use on their “martyrdom” missions. The supposed trafficking is being orchestrated by Baitullah Mehsud, who is an Al Queda ally and the head of Pakistani terror efforts. And although I was trying to stick with the facts on this one….WTF is going on with the apple pie on his head, fuck now im hungry…or it could be the munchies..his hair looks like Chaka Kahn’s bush that of a bum-ass terrorist so I guess ill leave it at that.

Both US and Pakistani military have been targeting Taliban strongholds controlled by Mehsud. On Tuesday, a U.S. drone fired a missile into a Taliban camp near the Afghan border, according to intelligence officials.

“He has been been admitting he holds a training center for young boys, for preparing them for suicide bombing,”  Maj. Gen. Akhtar Abbas, spokesman for the Pakistani army, told CNN. “So he is on record saying all this, accepting these crimes.”

You know, now that I think about it, I’ve known that human trafficking is a very real thing i our world,but I just never thought that people were being sold into the world of terrorism. Its some pretty heavy shit, but its real and if people don’t know that its going on, it can’t change….so bowl packs and positive thoughts go out to the victims of such disgusting crimes.

Hoes are apparently still fucking stupid taking meth in a big way….

Former U.S. figure skating champion Nicole Bobek has been charged with conspiracy to distribute methamphetamine in Hudson County, New Jersey. Bobek who hasn’t won a title since 1995 was arrested in Jupiter, FL last week and brought to New Jersey to faces charges for conspiracy to distribute methamphetamine. Nicole pleaded not guilty and is currently muff diving because no one will get her out waiting on $200,000 bail.

We don’t condone taking part in meth rings, because that shit is stupid and weed is better but there’s no doubt in my head that this crazy chick was hard up for cash when she decided to get involved. I just wish she would think about what she’s doing before she ends up looking like Stephanie Pratt.  The prosecutor handling the case said Bobek, “played a significant role in this operation. She was actively involved in the upper echelon of this ring.” If found guilty, Nicole could get up to 10 years in the slammer and a much needed fuckin detox from her life of meth rings..you know maybe she thought that she had to go through a meth ring to return to the skating ring???? NAH, im not even going to give her that “i’m a dumb shit excuse”, cause she might use it.

I’ll also take this time to throw a warning to all the potential “Nicole Bobeks” that we have out there……when you’re hurting for dough don’t get involved in hardcore drug rings, smoke a lot of weed and collect unemployment suck that shit up and get a job at Mcdonalds.

Alright so Lindsay Lohan has been in and out of the news for a number of dumb shit lesbian encounters with Samantha Ronson recently but US Weekly is reporting that the actress who’s been in such movies as “I Know Who Killed Me” had the audacity to turn down the part of Jade the stripper in the box office blockbuster “The Hangover”. Though all we see Lohan doing lately is participating in an on again off again lesbian relationship with Samantha, all we hear from her publicist is that she’s a workaholic and wants to be a huge actress. Well someone might want to tell her that her film choices, just like her relationships, blow. She believed the screenplay had no potential, $268 million worldwide later, she should probably never speak again. Here’s a passage from the US Weekly article;

Lindsay Lohan passed up a chance at a career comeback. The hard-partying starlet turned down a role in the summer blockbuster “The Hangover,” according to Us Weekly, because she said the screenplay “had no potential.” Todd Phillips, who directed the comedy, offered Lohan the role of Jade, a stripper played by Heather Graham. One source told the magazine Lohan’s agent “tried hard to get Phillips to consider her,” but “Lindsay said she didn’t like the script.” Lohan’s rep didn’t return e-mails.

Though we don’t particularly care about Heather Graham, we’re happy she had the sense to take the role and to her credit, acted rather well in the movie. Sorry Lindsay you missed the chance to actually be remembered as something other than an alcoholic lesbian party girl with an even bigger alcoholic party girl as a mother (mmmhmm we see you Dina). This blunt’s for you because when you hear how much the movie made it should make you nauseous and herb can help with that.

Also anyone who hasn’t seen “The Hangover” yet please go and see it, it’s definatley worth the price of a ticket but for a heightened comedy experience make sure you have some herbal refreshment as well.

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Nope, little miss Sarah Palin hasn’t made another stunningly foolish insightful and inspiring press conference about her premature departure from office as governor of Alaska. This disgusting display of famewhore desire that goes beyond that of our most villianized duo, Speidi, gem  of a video comes to us via NY republican congressman Pete King. In the video made a few days ago,Pete King says that we as a country should look beyond the greatness that was Michael Jackson, labeling him as a pervert and pedophile, two things that we know Michael was not. He believes that we should be glorifying our veterans and teachers and police officers instead of spending time celebrating the life of a supremely influential artist.

Well Pete is entitled to his opinion, but his views simply contradict themselves. How on one hand do you say that you would like to celebrate the actions of certain groups of people while simultaneously trying to “shit on” the legacy of another person. I’m not so sure what school of thought Pete’s thinking has been created from, but “fucking retard dip-shit lowlife hungry hippo” might be it. In the great sense of extreme boredom and self-loathing exploration I actually visited Pete King’s site and I was sadly greeted with more ignorance. So if you feel like a need to be amongst the unintelligent and cruel make a stop there and also you can call and say hello to Pete, maybe tell him that he should be more focused on government and his constituents rather than searching for fame, because one pit bull in lipstick is enough.

Pete is a very sad important individual and can be reached at 516-541-4225….or….202-225-7896…..or 631-541-4225